Childhood

I've read a lot of articles about childhood recently.  How the childhood of my generation was so much better than the ones that have come after.  How we are ruining our children with technology and inactivity.  How we need to stimulate our children with all sorts of different activities and that you can never do too much for them.  And, how danger lurks around every corner and how you can't let your children out of your sight for a second or someone will take them or someone with call CFS in fear that someone will take them.  It's exhausting to feel like you are always doing it wrong or that you could be doing things better but that is parenting; for every generation I suspect.

Yesterday I let my children do whatever they wanted in the morning because it was Saturday morning and I remember waking up and having the freedom to decide the fate of my day.  Cian played some video games and Emily coloured and dressed up as a cat.  I sat in the kitchen with a cup of coffee and left them alone.  They came to me when the pancakes were ready, we did a puzzle and then they went back to playing.

I had a brief moment when I thought I should play with them but then instead went for a bath and read my novel. After my bath I thought I would take them to the store but Cian found the summer stuff that Jen and Mike had returned to our house that morning and wanted to play with his newfound toys.  He brought the water table to the back deck and filled it with water.  It was mild outside and the water was not warm but he had a great time playing in the water in the early afternoon, still in his pajamas.  Emily found him, half undressed on her way to her room and she wanted to play in the water too.  They both took off all their clothes to splash each other with the water.  I got them the sidewalk chalk and they drew all over the back deck, asking before trying each new area "Can we write on the BBQ?" "How about the glass door?"  Gleefully they sprayed water, drew with chalk and became cleaning "robots" and spent hours on the deck playing naked covered in chalk.   Truthfully I had a couple moments that I worried people might see my naked children from the street or the lane and express their disapproval and then I realized that I did not care.  I remember playing for hours at randomness and enjoying fresh air and goofing around with nowhere to go.  The idea of going to the store was completely abandoned. Instead I decided to round out an "old school" Saturday and make zweibach like the mothers before me.  As my kids squealed and ran around the deck the "smell of love" was baking in my kitchen.  The kids ran in as the buns were coming out of the oven and I had to shoo away eager fingers from the steaming cooling racks as familiar smells wafted through the house.  Smacking bums up to the bathtub to clean up before snack.

The kids begged for buns before dinner and I fed my "fresh from the bath" children white bread and sweet preserves as they vibrated with delight.  We cleaned up the house getting it ready for their teenage babysitter to arrive.  They had Kraft dinner and sausage for supper and then watched a movie with their babysitter before bed and their parents went out.  They didn't even realize we had left.  Cian had a bit of an upset stomach while we were gone and Keith talked to him on the phone.  He said he was feeling better and went to bed - we did not come home early.  We enjoyed our dinner and show and then Keith drove the sitter home.  I put the remaining zweibach into old bread bags - like my grandmother used to do - before heading to bed.  A great Saturday.

Parenting is hard in any generation I think.  Our generation has access to the internet and every idea imaginable, it can be overwhelming all the things you aren't doing and aren't trying with your children.  That you are somehow denying them every option available because you have enhanced awareness of all these options.  It's paralyzing and I find it often prevents me from enjoying simple things that used to bring me joy and that I want to share with my kids.  The freedom of nothing to do.  The delight of a surprise afternoon activity.  Sunshine...water...fresh air....and homemade traditions baking in the kitchen.  It's a reminder for me to do less and plan less and maybe read less articles on the internet.

Creative Time on Mother's Day

Our tradition for days like Mother's Day or Father's Day is to give the other person time to have family time if they want but also to do other things they enjoy.  Today I got to spend some time in the loft (which I have completely rid of anything exam-related) and worked on the video I've had in my head since we left Australia.  Also, on days like this I get a little nostalgic (as I do every day that ends in y).  Anyway, it took longer to figure out how to share it than it did to make it but in case anyone wants to see the finished product - here it is.

Thanks to everyone who encouraged us to go to Australia last year and for all the people who came into our lives while we were there to share in our amazing experience.  I truly believe that the Land Down Under healed my soul and taught me how to breathe again.


Our Year in Australia

First Sleepover

Cian and his friend Henri have been asking to have a sleepover for months.  Henri's mom and I finally figured out that this weekend would work and that we would take Henri Friday night, that way the boys would have two nights to recover before going back to school.

Henri came over at 4:30 pm with his little Cars suitcase in tow and the boys escaped to the basement without any formals greetings or goodbyes.  They played for hours with trains and video games and semi-watched Big Hero 6 amongst 6 year old boy ideas of goofiness and rambunctious play.  We had pizza and birthday cake (for Keith) and around 8:30 pm we started the bedtime process.

Emily was sad that she wasn't having a sleepover ("I didn't pack any of my stuff !!" she said) so we decided she would have a sleepover with Mom.  So Emily, Mooma bear, unicorn and bee all spent the night with mommy in the big bed.

It only took a few times coming into the boys room to tell them to go to sleep before they finally succumbed to exhaustion.  I thought that part of the sleepover would be worse so that was a welcome surprise.

Despite falling asleep shortly before 10 the boys were up at 640.  (The little diva slept til 1030am)  The morning was full of Lego Batman and breakfast and lots of squeals and laughter.  Dr. Leslea came over around lunchtime to pick up Henri and both of them were upset about the ending of their fun.  What a wonderful thing for both of them: little boy friendship. :)

Kid-free Vacation

Last week I went to a conference in Orlando and Keith came with me.  My parents came out to watch the kids and it's a testament to how fun my parents are that our children had no issue with us going to Disneyland without them.

The conference was good.  I learned a lot and met a few people.  I'm unclear why that has to occur in a windowless, severely air-conditioned room but I'm not an organizer so it is what it is.  It was definitely worth going so that's positive.

After the conference we spent a day at Universal and a day at Disneyland. We blitzed Universal - going on 17 rides and doing all the big splash rides,  stood in awe at all the creativity in the Harry Potter exhibitions (it's amazing), had Butterbeer and basically we were giant nerds.  We were there for 13 hours running from ride to ride like kids.  With two minutes to spare we made the last run of the E.T. ride, hopped on the bikes and floated over the city to the sounds of that iconic music.  What a memory and I caught Keith watching me as I relived childhood memories. The perfect way to end off the night.

We spent the next day at Disneyland.  We went to Pixie Hollow to meet our daughter's favourite Tinkerbell (thanks for blowing her a kiss Tink!) and I had reserved Fastpasses for Keith's favourite rides.  As we were standing at the gate to enter the Space Mountain roller coaster suddenly it washed over me how lucky we were to have all these memories together.  That after almost 11 years together that we have shared almost a third of our lives and that he is the only person that will remember what it felt like as we walked into Diagon Alley together or as we sat together having snacks waiting for Disney's electric parade.  I am the only person who got to see him see his first big character parade at Disneyland and watch him take pictures to show our kids.  I regularly realize how lucky I am to be in a loving marriage but I don't think I'd thought about the memory aspect and how for people who aren't married anymore how that's an added hurt to what they have to go through. That your memory companion isn't with you anymore.  For all my friends where that is part of your life's journey I hope you know I'm thinking of you and that I don't take what I have for granted.

We sat on the stoop on Main Street that evening and watched the Electric Parade and the fireworks show.  What amazing creativity and wonder - I can't wait to share it with the kids when they are a bit older.  We spent a lot of time thinking about how we would share this adventure with them - it's a nice way to spend a day in Disneyland - preparing to share it with your kids.  It was a wonderful break for Keith and I to recharge and to come back to our kids with a newfound enthusiasm.  It was also really good for them to spend solo time with their grandparents - I remember the times I had alone with my grandparents with such fondness and it's so good for them.  Even if they get spoiled rotten as yesterday would attest:

Cian:  Mom I want ice cream with cookies in it.
Me: Where did you get something like that?
Cian: YOUR mom gave it to me - OMI!

Tooth Fairy

Cian lost his front tooth on the weekend and put a note under his pillow for the tooth fairy.  In the morning I had forgotten that the tooth fairy came in the night and brought him a loonie and four quarters (our tooth fairy is clearly a frugal Mennonite).  He runs out of the room with his coins and proclaims "MOM, I HAVE MONEY!"  and without a thought or hesitation "I'M GOING TO BUY EMMY A CAR!" How does that not melt your heart?

I told him the tooth fairy had brought that money for him and that he could spend it on himself but he wanted to buy a car for his sister so Keith took him to the store and luckily Hot Wheels were on sale for $1 each so Keith convinced him to get one for Em and one for himself and he would cover the taxes.

What a great kid - so proud to be his mom.

Springsgiving

I have decided that I am doing a big Thanksgiving meal in every season.

There are many reasons for this:

1) I love throwing dinner parties
2) I love filling the house with people
3) I love spending all day cooking and baking in my pajamas
4) Not everyone I love can come to the fall Thanksgiving
5) I have too much to be thankful for - it can't fit into a once a year activity

So I figured four times a year would be a much better prospect and that way I can experiment with different food and differing groups of friends.  The constant at each I have decided will be my Grandmother's perschke.  It's my tribute to her at each dinner, like she's always there with me in the kitchen.

We had Springsgiving last Sunday and it was a smashing success.  Devin was visiting, we had our staple family members there and close friends with their kiddos.  An extended adult table and an attached kid table was great fun and there was lots of food and beverages.  Everyone said what they were thankful for (including cups!) and it was great to reconnect with old friends and get to know new ones better.  There is so much to be thankful for in my life and hopefully celebrating gratitude will help me raise thankful children too.  Thanks to all our friends and family near and far for all that you are in our lives.

Spring Break

This past week we had a visitor in our basement during Spring Break....the beloved Devin Bruce.

The kids woke up every morning at 6am (and the last night at 4am - ohhh Cian) and would "sneak" downstairs to jump on their teddy bear of a buddy tucked in behind the couch in the basement.  They would play video games and watch fun shows, have story time and dance parties.  The "guy with the beard" was a huge hit as always.

Keith had a buddy to play boardgames and card games with (I have no interest in Game of Thrones the card game) and I had someone to get dressed up with and go out for a fancy dinner and watch old movies in an old theatre (Roman Holiday at the Met - so lovely!).

Our "new" friends met our "old" friend over the course of his time here and became fast friends too.  Lots of food and sightseeing recommendations which ended up with fresh donut discoveries making it back to our house (a delicious perk!).

It's occasionally a little awkward still (only for Devin and I) but that is changing over time, like a dissonant chord progression that might not be what you expect but is lovely just the same.